Difficult, hard, trying, annoying...tick.

I am having a hard week. Actually I've had a very challenging few weeks.
Its one of those times when I don't feel like I'm in control of my emotions. I feel like everythings built up and hit me at force. Situations that I normally deal with objectively become personal again. Friends are choosing this time to be difficult. And there is work work work lots of work.

I'm annoyed because professionally this week should be a highlight for me and I'm not getting to enjoy it. I'm exhausted. I want to be able to look at these new projects and be proud of what I've created. Theres no time tho.

I had 3 hrs yesterday of almost worry free time. A perfect project. The Lomo project. I love it. I love the tutors, the young people, the concept, everything about it. A few wee outside worries crept in but for those three hours locked away in the studio I was genuinly enjoying myself. So much so I've decided to be a participant in the project. Wowowowo. I have homework. I hope I can squeeze it in.

Friends are a stress right now. Not all friends. Just some. Or two. I don't know. But I do know that I want to become independant again. When I think back to my happy wee routine before camp where I went swimming every day, had a smoothie in the cafe and then maybe did some work I was really happy. I think I'll recreate the swimming days. Its like another wee world in the pool, I like just being me and my thoughts.

Maybe I'll add it onto my to do list: time for me and my thoughts away from everyday stresses and difficult and emotionally trying friends. Tick.

H x