Sick but happy.

I have a chest infection.
I have my period.
I haven't slept properly the last few nights.
I have a headache that won't shift.
I can't get my head round work.

But I'm surprisingly not too stressed.

A little grumpy yes. And definitly irritable. But not too stressed.

This time last year I would've been freaking. I like that I'm calmer these days.

I spent this afternoon working on the proposal for the piece of work that I wanted to create with Rob. He agreed to it the other day. Surprised me on the bus by being like so you know that idea you had... I'm excited and really hope that we manage to get a residency to explore it.

I also had a really good masterclass with the nts yesterday. It was on contemporary theatre practice which is something thats really interesting me at the moment. And its something that I feel I have the ability and confidence to do. This time last year or even a few months ago I don't know if I could have. Its funny how life and circumstances impacts on your confidence and self esteem.

Part of me almost wants to go and do some study again. Or at least have longer in the workshops and skill ups that I've been doing. I've been getting so much out of them, I'm enjoying learning and feel that its reaffirming my own practice. I want more workshops, maybe one a week please?

I'm excited to see whats next....

H x

Definitly not smelling of pee...

Today I was standing at the bus stop when this auld boy came up and started singing All the Single Ladies to all the auld dears at the bus stop. Legend. Bet he was well smooth in his day. Actually I reckon he's still got it.

I want to be proper crazy when I'm old. Or maybe not crazy in my own head but able to get away with lots of eccentric behaviour. I reckon I'll still be wearing faux fur and sequins and hangin out with my gays. Maybe I'll run some sort of gay tea dance that plays Lady Gaga.

I love when people know that because they are old or mentally ill that crazy behaviour is expected of them. So they're like fuck it better live up to the expectations. There was this woman who was in hospital with my Mum years ago who used to go down to Iceland everyday and eat packets of ham and take the lids of tubs of icecream and lick the icecream. Iceland would have to call the Royal Ed and be like Luna's back, goin come get her, she's lickin the icecream again! I loved her. Definitly reckon she knew what she was up to.

And I really like that lady who drinks in the port who used to dance at the bus stop and would shout 'phone cunt!' at me whenever she saw me on my mobile. And Cowboy Joe 'bang bang money for the whiskey', white face lady and hiyaaaa whats your name girl. Leith has loads of good crazies and I reckon thats what makes it such a fantastic place to live. Its a real community place and we're pretty protective of our crazies, theres facebook sites dedicated to cowboy joe and people get generally worried if they've not seen him out for a while.

So I guess my point is that in my book eccentric behaviour makes you lovable and definitly more interesting. But only genuinly cool eccentric behaviour not hideous, high school drama teacher eccentric. And I think to be genuinly cool eccentric you have to be age 60+. I can't fucking wait!

So who's up for licking some icecream tubs?

H x